I have to be very honest and say that the end of Natday celebrations brings with it more relief than any regret/nostalgia. I was never a Hang Around School Looking Purposeful person, if I could go home at 12 and revel in my lack of social life I WOULD~
I would also do these things:
1) Lose Some Weight
Contrary to common wisdom I actually gain weight while feeling stress (Appetite Elasticity of Stress > 0). Staying in school also renders me highly vulnerable to the $2 Green Tea / Chocolate ice-cream. GET THEE BEHIND ME, ICE-CREAM!
2) Get An Imaginary Girlfriend Named Fifi
Now that I actually have some time to myself, I shall pretend I get to spend this time with SOMEONE ELSE – this shall be done by creating a Facebook account called Fifi Foo and getting into a relationship with Matthew Chan (which is my self). People will think I’m extremely cool for having a girlfriend and start Commenting on my wall and Liking my status updates, and I will feel loved.
3) Stop Looking Like Shit
Presumably I don’t look like shit on a normal day, which is why I was deeply alarmed to at my looking like shit in the days building up to the 6th. All this will change in a jiffy! I will put on anti-shit cream and Konstipation Kleanser (which I bought from the mama shop near my house) and eventually look vaguely human. Even if I do look like shit on a normal day, at least I can aspire to be ATAS SHIT, which sits primly at the top of the pile smelling nice.
4) Stop Swearing
Council has made me a very vulgar person. There’re more holes in my temper than in the ‘3 for $10’ socks I bought in China in 2006. This will change once I become Good and Happy once again. Because when I am Good and Happy I’ll mend the holes, singing merry tunes to myself and catching dragonflies with Fifi.
5) Pose In My 10km Bay Run Shirt
I’ll be running 10km next Sunday! Which isn’t the point, because I just signed up to get the shirt. I shall wear it everyday and appear sporty and fitness-conscious. I’ll be running with Rich. Who isn’t Fifi. Fifi can’t run 10km so she’ll be at home cheating on me.
6) Mend Some Bridges