her name is alberta she lives in vancouver!

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It’s happened; Facebook has officially screwed up our lives thrice over. We can die in the past at the click of a few buttons and pile X-rays on a wafer cone. There were more revelations revealed to me as I perused the Live Feed, seeking wisdom, but I was too horrified and I ran away into my real-life toilet bowl, throwing up some real-life vomit, crying real-life tears, as I fervently sought a deliverance from this mortifying land we call the Internet.

And then my online girlfriend sent me a message and I ran back to my room to send a kiss and several emoticons that looked like two people making out.

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