Heroes Season Two Premiere on Channel 5! Tonight!
Singapore I luv you (and you’re only 27 years older than me so we’d be great together because I go for older and more mature nations) and everything, but you’re totally the Slowest Airer Of Awesome Series-es. I watched Season Two ages ago, and so have America and all the other cool donut-dunkin’ countries.
Honestly, by the time we air Season Three, America will be on Season 11 and then while I’m talking to my online pals they’ll be like “oMG NERF DAT ROBOT GURL WIF DE ULTRASOUND POWERZ” and then another guy will be like “YA NO SHIT NERF HER SRSLY, PETER’S GRANDSON IS TOTALLY GETTING PWNZORED LIKE A PWNZVICTIM IN A PWNZTORNADO K?!?!?!?!” and then I will have NO IDEA WHAT THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT and will thus Not Fit In or even Not Catch Up With The Conversation. Which may lead to depression and suicide and all those terrible things. And should I have to write an AQ about it in my English EOY I’ll be like:
Passage A thinks that the “robot girl with the ultrasound powers should be nerfed”, while Passage B feels that “yes, no shit, nerf the robot girl, seriously; Peter’s grandson is totally getting pawned like a pawned victim in a pawn-tornado, okay?!?!?!?!?!” Personally I have nothing to say to this because LIEK WTF, SINGAPORE HASN’T AIRED THE DAMNED EPISODE SO I DON’T KNOW HOW TO RESPOND AND SHALL JUST SIT HERE DUMBLY AND MAKE GRUNTING NOISES. GRUNT GRUNT GRUNT.
So, Channel 5, you’re nice and I appreciate your efforts, but when Season Three comes out in late September I’m going to have to ditch you for BitTorrent, because BitTorrent has got The Stuff, and you don’t have The Stuff, and I really, really want to pass my English EOY. Thank you for the good times. The last time I liked one of your sitcoms was ages ago, but you cover the Olympics, so you’ll always be special to me.