flattery gets you to europe and back

The squirt with the pink blog (thereon my name for her) has been relentlessly flamed today, by known and unknown RI guys. My indomitable influence marches on, ha! Squirt has equally bigoted RGS friends; can see where she gets her hateful hauteur from. (YES. I’M USING THE THESAURUS TO REPLACE MY WORDS WITH CHEEM COUNTERPARTS SO THAT THEY ALLITERATE AND MAKE ME SOUND SOPHISICATED. DEAL WITH IT.)

Relevant tags

3 Feb 08, 19:56

dooty: stop feeding off the praises of your friends and revelling in your misguided Nazi-like opinions about people. you are NOT hip or cool for being a bigot, and in fact I think you will never be.

3 Feb 08, 19:53

mockery: well, do all rg girls think elitist? that sucks. and i thought our school was elitist. eh, so much for ‘elitist ri’. the attention needs to go to rg for once.

3 Feb 08, 19:51

dooty: ha, my flame post on your elitism made you popular. thank me. and anyone with half a brain would see that the “nsk” posts are INTENTIONALLY DESIGNED THUS.

3 Feb 08, 19:32

passerby: WE are disgusting? Your egos are disgusting, more like.

3 Feb 08, 16:16

stef(: hello janneh ignore the disgusting flamers okay their tags are very.nsk.

3 Feb 08, 10:05

shihui: Whoo.U noe Nigel?He is a freak.ACS dudes are EVERYWHERE/:

3 Feb 08, 00:10

N193L: Y0u 3Liti5t PIG! H0W D4re joo Insultzz Ush NSKs? Juz Bcos U R Smater duz not meen U R Betr lorhx. Plz Lorhx.

2 Feb 08, 23:26

shiren: hey janne, no matter what people say, you still rock. okay? (: and we lubbxz you

2 Feb 08, 22:02

janne: I like aardvarks, they make good witches’ pets. Um, why are there so many anonymous people? It’s like, so weird.

2 Feb 08, 21:56

ex Libris: Ew, you’ve got as much charm as an aardvark trying to chew. Now flame me, Elitists!

2 Feb 08, 20:46

janne: everyone: Thank you.

2 Feb 08, 19:46

hciR( random guy): nice phrase!! ” cuz we rock we get stoned” btw ur posts r quite err eye-catching. i got directed here by another blog.

1 Feb 08, 18:49

shihui: Ahahaha. Your blog is like,the most interesting to read ever! And,I shall reply your letter! D. Sheesh.owe everyone so many letters._.

31 Jan 08, 21:57


31 Jan 08, 21:54

RACHEL: I AGREE WITH THE FUNNY ARTICLE POST. janne i love you are you emo? xP

hciR (random guy ), by the way, is a retard. I SHALL PRETEND I DON’T KNOW WHO HE IS BECAUSE HE IS A DISGRACE. After Squirt’s defenders started defending her honour in irritating manner, I just had to butt in.

Stacy signed us up for this Sell Hongbaos For President’s Challenge Outside Chinatown MRT Station CIP thing. If CIP is indeed stratified in lameness, the lamest CIP HAS to be selling hongbaos for President’s Challenge outside Chinatown MRT station. There were stores out there selling hongbaos for cheap (even keeping the tourists in mind, I suspect), while we were going around, peddling our “2 packets for $1, 4 for $2” red packets. It just didn’t work out. My bag was heavy. I was thirsty. And the throngs of people ignoring me was too much for my ego (which shrunk a little in the rain as well).

For ten minutes I made no sale. I felt horribly ugly and repulsive. My cute voice had chosen an untimely period in my life to leave me, so no points from that as well.

Nicole: Hi!
Me: Oh, hi! Uh, hey, want to buy some red packets? For charity! Yeah.
Me: Hey, buy leh! [pesters Nicole’s sis] Hey, pretty girl! Come here! Pretty girl! Want to buy?

They walk away, but Nicole returns with a crisp $2, muttering something about ‘pity’. Ha! I bet that was totally NOT the case. I bet her sister was all, “Hey, let’s buy from that guy! Uh, I mean, he’s so cool man!” Flattery will get you ANYWHERE.’

…though it didn’t work when I tried it on the old ladies.

Me [in Mandarin]: Hi, xiao jie, you want to buy some red packets for charity?
Old lady: [stares at me and walks away]

Me: Ha, Geoffrey! I made a sale and you didn’t! Now you’re the only one without a sale!
Geoff: You cheated! You met a friend!
Me: Oh, shush, I don’t talk to sale-less people.
[two groups of people walk by and buy from Geoff]
Me: Oh. My. Gosh.
Geoff: You got pwned.

Before long, I was tagging along with Geoffrey, stealing his kills, because he always picks the right people. I stole about $20 of his kills, because I’m awesome. And assholey. Awesomeness is nothing without assholery.

Geoffrey: Hello, wanna buy red packets?
[person looks interested, unlike 99% of those approached]
Me [steps forward]: Yeah, it’s for charity. Two packets for $1 and four packets for $2.
[person gives me $2 and takes my red packets]
[Geoffrey looks immensely pissed]

My best kill steal from him was $10.

Stacy was walking around, taking photos and looking lost and pitiful, disheveled-looking from the rain. She made a few sales from that, I’d like to believe.

Four hours of CIP is immensely tough to earn. The ways in which people ignore you are shocking. You could talk to them, and they could pretend to look at the sky for no apparent reason, walking past you. TOTAL ANNOYANCE. I bet even I don’t do that when approached!

Or at least, I think I don’t. I act scared and xenophobic when approached. That’s somewhat better, right?

In the end, I made the most sales, because I stole half of Geoffrey’s sales. I also laughed at his name (“GEOffrey, hahaha! GEEFREE, geddit? HAHAHA! Hey, guess what? GEOffrey! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh my gosh, Geefree! [wipes tear from eye]” and his bag nonstop (“HAHAHA! Green tea! Stolen contraband! HAHAHAHA! Oh my gosh, look, green tea packets! You’re a terrorist! HAHAHAHA! [wipes tear from eye]“) during the train ride home, so I think he hates me now.

Some people are just horribly quick to anger.


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