it’s tough being a star

jonlian: It’s Stacy’s sis. I went to her house to get whore-rified (no pun intended), remember?
Greg: Aw. It didn’t fall flat. It just wasn’t wholly appreciated by me :(
Eng Hong: Hahaha! That’s what RI students do too! Except the teachers had long wised up – they start looking out for students sitting at the back who look like they’re fiddling with plastic stuff under the table.
yishu: Ew! Then again, I can totally imagine that on Luna Lovegood.
zhiming: Agrees with pizzat.

My phone number has changed again!

It is back to 97957175 (long story).

So if you’d changed my phone number, change it back!

If you hadn’t, good on you! (the moral of the story is: diligence doesn’t pay)

It’s cool getting my number back. I could just imagine the number of people trying to call me with the old number, and going all, “OMG! MATTHEW DIDN’T ANSWER MY PHONE CALL! He must, like, totally reject me as a person or something! BOOHOO Matthew is, like, TOO popular and cool for me now! Does he think I’m… *gasp* lame or stupid or insecure? Nooooooo! My life is not worth living anymore!”

It’s okay.

Mondays with Mooty: a weekly feature (duh)

In twenty years time, the most commonly used word in English wouldn’t even be an English word.

“lol.”

lol is such a usable word! It totally beats “okay” or “mmhm” in noncommittal monosyllabic returns! It can be used in almost any context, even though it was at first meant to express genuine mirth and joy. That is, in the past, you would be expected to be laughing out loud while typing “lol”.

Now, it means anything from “get lost, asshole” to “how much, ho?”

Let me illustrate this with a not-so-atypical MSN conversation. A is a normal guy trying to chat, and B is a self-obsessed, insincere asshole.

A: Hello B!
B: lol
A: How’s school?
B: lol
A: Yeah, me too.
B: lol
A: You know what? It’s my birthday today!
B: lol
A: Yeah! I’m happy too.
B: lol
A: So… what are you doing now?
B: lol
A: Huh??
B: lol
A: Wait a minute…
B: lol
A: My grandfather died last week and my grandmother contracted AIDS
B: lol
A: YOU’RE NOT PAYING ATTENTION! ASSWIPE!
B: lol
A: Grr…

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