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In A.D. 2101

War was beginning.

Captain: What happen?

Mechanic: Somebody set up us the bomb.

Operator: We get signal.

Captain: What!

Operator: Main screen turn on.

Captain: It’s you!!

CATS: How are you gentlemen!!

CATS: All your base are belong to us.

CATS: You are on the way to destruction.

Captain: What you say!!

CATS: You have no chance to survive make your time.

CATS: HA HA HA HA….

Operator: Captain!

Captain: Take off every ‘ZIG’!!

Captain: You know what you doing.

Captain: Move ‘ZIG’.

Captain: For great justice.

or: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:AllYourBaseAnimated.gif

there was this master with 3 servants. one day he had to leave for somewhere. so he went to his servants and said “take care of my money and use it well.” he gave each of them 10 dollars.

after awhile he returned and asked his servants to account for his money. the first said, “i used it to invest and earned 100 times more!” the second said, “i used it to invest and earned 10 times more!” the third said, “i was scared i would lose the money so i dug a hole and hid it there.”

the master was happy with the first 2 servants but really really pissed with the third. because he was a loser and didn’t make use of the money. so the master gave the first servant many times what he had earned, and same for the second servant. and the master took away the 10 dollars that the third guy had and gave it to the first two servants.

sometimes i feel God hasn’t given me a lot. like how people have xbox and psp and nintendo ds. and i have nothing. like how people are so tall and big and strong. and how people are so books-smart while my God-given gift (if any)… i just shudder to think what i have been “blessed” with.

actually God has given me a lot.

i don’t live in a non-secular country. there are no wars. i don’t go around thinking when my next meal is. i get to download FIFA World Cup 2006 Demo. and oh yeah, my IQ just happens to be in the top 2% of the population, however true that might be.

oh, so i am so blessed – i mean, lucky. thank you God, amen amen love you God, now let’s get back to my computer game.

no free lunch in the world! when God gives you something he wants you to invest that to save souls! not just brag about it or use it for your own purposes! because he can take that away! on my rare reading of non-sports or non-comics pages of the newspapers i read about this hwa chong guy who met some accident and now has to learn ABCs again. [cunningly avoids making joke about God being Rafflesian so that i won't get struck down by lightning tomorrow]

hehe. you should try this website. our physics teacher gave us this because it apparently teaches you physics stuff, but it’s fun to set all the gravity/friction to extreme values and watch the roller coaster do funny things!

there was physics test today. it was pretty simple (i prefer physics to the other two! it’s so math, except that you only remember one or two simple formulae and apply with simple math. instead of remembering dumb element names and/or taking down lots of notes). but i misunderstood a question and lost 2 marks. can’t be too perfect. parents will get suspicious.

but the makeup-for-friday math test yesterday was messed up. i don’t listen in class so i thought exterior angles were 360 deg minus the interior angle so i was like “eh. this question impossible.” so it turns out you have to draw a straight line and take that angle, so it’s 180 minus int angle. wtf who needs to know what the exterior angle is?? like there’s so much use in that.

geog today was so funny. i think we kept laughing when yaksy says something funny, which is always, so we irritated her or something, or we displayed ignorance or something, so she said “i know this boy, he did RE on what girls like in boys. so in the end he found out they don’t only look for good-looking boys, they also like knowledgeable boys.” so we were like “okay so?” then she said, “like maybe when you’re walking with a girl outside J8 you can like point to the sky and say ‘look, those are cumulonimbus clouds.’” then we erupted into laughter.

hehe abel you missed the fun.

i’m going for training tomorrow no matter what my mother says. otherwise yu hsuen and my conscience will keep irritating me.

grr.

i spent like so long downloading the fifa world cup 2006 demo. including a few incomplete downloads that wasted all my time since i couldn’t wait for 4 hours to download it.

the demo stinks! what kevin didn’t tell me was that the game ends after 45 minutes so there’s no conclusion. also, movement is harder than fifa 04. players seem to have more.. “inertia” than usual :)

oh well. i WILL definitely get: fifa 07 and fifa manager 06 when it comes out (maybe in oct, plus minus 1 month). even if it means scrimping on lunch. fifa manager is cool! you manage but you also get to see the players in action, instead of the 2D match engine fm has that makes you follow circles running around.

oh yeah. i escaped school today! i was slightly drowsy from yesterday. then i woke up at 8+ and made instant noodles for breakfast. then i walked to tanglin mall for a macs lunch at like 2.

the merchant of the venice. “drama challenge”! which is a dumb school way of saying class play. can’t wait to do that.

there are artists, lights/sounds, props, director, logistics etc. all were too boring/hard so i opted for scriptwriter. so it’s a 3-strong team of me, yu dong and diao! woot.

jon is the director! no contest there. apparently director gets to veto scripts and work with scriptwriters etc.

i thought of this idea! antonio and bassanio and the other etceteras can all be P1 students. so:

antonio borrowed 50c from shylock, the kid everyone ostracises because he has a, um, figure “L” birthmark on his forehead or something. they write IOU: if antonio doesn’t pay, shylock, who is evil, will cut off antonio’s pinky.

so antonio can’t pay. maybe because his father died, than 2 days later his mom died. (that’s so cruel, but it fits the story) so shylock goes to see the teacher.

shylock: antonio owe me money but neh pay! (takes out IOU) see: “Antonio Tan owes Shylock Ng 50c. If not Shylock Ng may cut off Antonio Tan’s pinky finger.”

then bassanio lim, the rich kid steps up.

bassanio: shylock, i give you $1 plus 2 erasers if you don’t cut off antonio’s pinky!
antonio: nevermind. i will take it like a man.
bassanio: but got blood one leh.
antonio: blood? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

diao.

my other concern is the rafflesian spirit essay for the school publication that isn’t compulsory but the grand prize is an ipod nano! omglol that’s going to be mine soon. even if i have to write corny stuff about S Rajaratnam and Harry Lee Kuan Yew. MINE!

-

i’ve invented a super way of filing woot!

1. sort through your super huge stacks of paper on your desk, shelf, in bag, paper files. get those for that particular subject, pile them up.
2. hole punch every one of them before proceeding.
3. sort by topic.
4. sort each topic by date. at this juncture, if you have uncompleted worksheets, attempt them or just leave them out if they’re hopelessly undone. if you attempt them at least you can say you forgot to hand in.
5. put all in. update content pages. fake some dates if you don’t have them.

-

i’m ill! with sore throat which escalated into cough+runny nose. i got lots of funny medicine plus a… golden MC!!!! all that glisters is not gold. but my pap says go to school if you aren’t dying and asphyxiated and frothing at the mouth yet running a fever because no one likes to miss precious lesson time do we? grr. i don’t care. going to feign some funny illness next morning. it’s RE day and ERP submission day and math TA day!!

so i have to go to school but i can’t go for training! for like one week! nooo i’m going to be out of touch with the ball when i get back. happens every time! like my passing + shooting skills will get screwy and weak.

it’s time to utter 3 words that i know will not endear me to the noobs at school.

I KNEW IT.

didn’t i resolutely say that italy would win? and all those people just going “italy sucks!” “yah italy sucks!” “france will win”

eh? you know who win? you know who win?

I WIN!!!!! or rather, ITALIA WIN!!!

anyway, the game makes me a super jinx to football. every knockout match i’ve watched so far have all gone into penalties! and they are the ONLY THREE matches that went into penalties! oh, except ukraine v swiss.

but as shootouts go that was quite a good shootout. like everyone except loser trezeguet scored. and none of the goalkeepers saved anything.

can’t believe zidane… it’s so sad. he got sent off, and wasn’t even allowed to come up and receive his loser’s medal! there goes him. at least he got a goal.

italia owns! the only goals they’ve conceded are own goal (x1) and penalty (x1)!

i hate france because of: henry, gallas, makelele, and “to a small extent”, vieira! the banes of EPL! haha. besides, italy have cool names and jerseys and defence. fabio cannavaro looks more of a captain than vieira or henry will ever be. france had the better attack, but cannavaro! i think i shall buy him in fm05.

alas. time to put away that world cup chart pinned up on the wall. besides i can remember (for now) every single score. LOL i have nothing better to do.

and oh yeah.

here and here

portugal will beat germany! and italy will beat france!

yes… i know everyone else is backing france. i know everyone hates italy. who gives? they’re all noobs. especially those england supporters.

truth is, italy have the best defence in the world, and what’s football without defence? all you get are heaps of goals. besides, they have cool attacking defenders like zambrotta! and who says their strikers are necessarily poorer than other “attacking” countries’ strikers? they’ve scored 5 in the last 2 games, and who cares if they’re in the last 2 minutes. hey, remember how manu were losing 0-1 after 90 minutes to munich or something in the champs league final. and how they scored 2. that’s called classic! people remember those!

of course, having said that, i’m not a fan on italy. i’m just pissed at france. man, henry looked like he was diving, seriously. fine, he was slightly tackled, but he was alright at first, then he saw the ball and went towards it and tripped. whatever!

portugal owns. besides, so few people support them, so it makes their impressive run to the semis even nicer. let’s see them equal their 3rd place in ‘66! germany are hosts, but this is a loser’s battle afterall, and the team with the least depression will win. clash of the young teams here, of the old in the “Grand Final”. i would have preferred a portugal-germany final!

so anyway, i spent today slacking, and then skipping rope until i had a blister (LOL) and doing 200 crunches (in parts of 50, but after awhile it’s impossible not to stop after every 5) and some lousy pushups.

[i'm addicted to fifa 04! i shall burn it before returning to my 8-year-old cousin. one downside is kevin keeps bragging about his pro team.]

due to popular demand 1%, and a moral obligation to blog 99%, here i am with another blog post!

lol. fourth of july! it’s the only holiday directly known as the date it falls on, so i remembered it this morning. but there was no mention in the papers! oh, by papers i mean sports section and comics.

i did my history filing! i took 1 over hour, which included a large amount of time reading the sports. john terry for england captain? please! i’d even rather gerrard. or rooney. or walcott. chelsea is lame.

talking about walcott, sven goran (which i think is pronouced “yoran” or something, because that’s how one WC commentator called him.) is defending his choice to play walcott in the tourney. did i say play? i meant bench him without using him, because everyone’s scared because he’s not even played a single EPL match before. i KNEW IT! i predicted that after the talking tough and, wah, “gambling” on the genius of walcott to “rise to the occasion”, they won’t dare to play that guy.

mclaren is next to be tested. he doesn’t look like a national manager! he looks like someone who should stay as assistant and become the sung unsung hero (unsung hero is so… warped. someone must be singing his praises for those people to get onto the news in the first place.) ‘I tell you the truth’, if luiz felipe scolari had joined england england would be going to the finals! too bad for england.

lol polo is getting fun! but still tiring! at least i get constant match opportunities now. and i don’t have to play like some useless floater in the pool. shall go swim on my own more often now. government say must equip ourselves with more skills what. i know i can be better if i try! (gives tough look and poised to fight with my mini fists)

i probably won’t get into the b div team anyway. i must stop thinking about cca as points! why can’t i enjoy it without thinking about sneaking into the team again? it’s fun enough getting elbowed in the forehead by a very tough center forward sec 1 (it still hurts), or having to do endless laps of swimming, which i hate.

still, i can put quite a bit of distance between me and the other “noobs” now!

i am not inactive.

i was just trying to do some dumb SMALL assignment which i took 1 hour to do.

i hate MOV. shakespeare has a very dry sense of humour. i prefer in-your-face slapstick, like morally offensive jokes and swear words used in a weird way.

the new teacher was suck okay. which kind of teacher puts down rules like “have fun while learning”? and she claims she’ll punish students who break the “Students are encouraged to obey the following rules” rules by monetary punishments which will go into her own pocket. not that i feel that’s a sucky idea, but she’s going to get all the RI parents pissed and after her blood. that’s almost as bad as caning!

haha portugal jacked england. i irritated kenneth tang whole of today. mannn can’t believe he’s an england fan. portugal all the way! (i supported them right from the start! they have so nice jersey colours and Deco and c Ronaldo!) brazil.. i watched the review and they had more chances but they didn’t have a specific purpose! they gave up after that goal. france had many other chances too. brazil have world class players. all gone thanks to a sucky thierry henry volley. i knew right from the start zidane wasn’t too old!

still, germany for the title. beating france i reckon. germany got to the finals last time when they didn’t even have the home crowd supporting them. portugal must beat italy for 3rd! italy had a damn easy knockout stage.

i haven’t posted in so long! whee. i was working on this sitcom i would be releasing to my faithful blogders, which has everything a sitcom has! laughtracks… sex references… and more laughtracks and sex references!

but for now i shall talk about futbol. i can’t believe germany won! i started watching not supporting any team, because germany was quite a good team too! then as it went on i supported argentina, because they were the better team. man it wasn’t over after 90 minutes (which pissed my sis cos she wanted to watch some taped show after the match, kekeke) extra time. penalties! argentina was never going to win – they had subbed out riquelme and crespo for sucky subs! game over to the favourites. penalty shootout, i deduce, should support the home team. imagine if argentina stepped up to take the penalty and the crowd went “BOO”. haha, the players should have been trained to keep their composure. cambiasso isn’t that good, his “wonder-goal” in serbia-montenegro match wasn’t a solo effort. it was a good goal but afterall more teamwork then skill, like tevez’s goal. so he missed and germany are through!

then italy and ukraine. this is scary: everyone seems to be hating italy! i mean, yes, they kicked out czech, but czech only had themselves to blame for losing to ghana and also losing their two main strikers! then of course the diving incident against australia. i hate australia because their name is so STUPID and because they call football soccer like the americans. besides, italy have a nice jersey! :) i watched the review of the match and ukraine were so suay not to score any goals. luca toni, the 2 goal hero, had an easy header and a ridiculous tap-in for his goals, but he still got his name on the scoresheet.

i shall be catching england portugal! this late-night football is easy to get used to, hehe. 2-1 to portugal. england might score through gerrard or joe cole. portugal… pauleta and maniche?

wow this year might have another germany v brazil final! scary. germany to lift the cup against brazil? brazil have only been runners-up against france before. with their rivals out they will have an easy route to the cup. boooooring.

gogogo shamsul maidin! he’s the super singaporean ref! haha asia’s sole representative at the world cup now, observe the irony.

after training yesterday (which was darn tiring but quite fun since we did drills and got to pwn the sec ones) yu hsuen and i were messing up the bah chor mee podcast. i came up with:

“hey, this has noodles in it.”
“hey, this has food in it.”
“hey, this has something in it.”

/rant